mega!
this is how bored i am, im updating my poorly treated LJ.

so yea...

whats been up LJ, seen any good movies lately? i have, it was called Ong-bak or some shit, this crazy china man kicked alot of ass. yea, thats pretty much the entire premise of the movie.

um yea,

>.>

im sitting here trying not to actually write in this thing seriously, because i've never been to attracted to such journal things. always felt like it was a bit of a pansy thing to do. /shrug. but you know its hard with all this peer pressure! i mean all the cool kids are doing it. meh, its something to do while i find somethign else to do.

so yea, i guess ive always had a thing for LJ. all the people that use it, all 9 million of them. i guess use it for hte same reason i sometimes do to. theres no one to talk to, but in that, we find other people who talk to themselves and in turn, everyone talks to eachother. or something. i admit, ive always had a problem with, how you say, opening up, to anybody. ive never really 'shared' my emotions and FEEEEELIIIIINGS regularly with anyone. ive learned to push shit back and deal ya know? and now that shits come to a head and i still have trouble actualyl talking it out with someone, im here. yeaaaa

i honestly have no idea who reads this shit besides myself so i wouldnt know what to say or not say because i dont know who would read this. but meh, ill say what i think is enough.

i've lost interest. in just about everything. and it scared the shit outta me. then i lost interest in being scared, which is kind of a vicious cycle. it sucks ya know? nick, the total guitar/music genius just not interested in playing and/or composing? nick, aka tunk the tank, not attending every raid possible? nick, the hopeless romantic none of you know not yearning for something? im broken man, wtf. maybe im like my computer. the power supply had just recently burnt out. all activity lost. some crazy shit happens to me, i feel overwhelemd for a bit, then nothing. wtf mate. i can't even listen to a song without wnating to change it to something else. i cant sit and listne to a song and appreciate liek i used to. im not being satisfied with the music i have, ive stopped writing music becuase of some shitfaced writers block, man, really, wtf. i can remember only one time where i was never satisfied to what i listened to, i dont remember why or what pulled me out of it, but i know it mustve been serious. its gotta be fucking world shattering to me if im not satisfied wit hthe music im listening to.

meh, now i can see why (not the first time i believe) so many people are practically addicted to avid LJ users. something about throwing all your thoughts and problems out in words is so seductive. meh, ill stop now before i start editing how it looks and pay for an account here.